Oct 12, 2007

Archived Postings No. 2

Q-n-A Subjects for May 2006:
Deadliest Spider in the World; Women Masturbating; Corn Huskers; Pussy Farts; Deadliest Snakes in the World; White Panties; Bowel Movement Problems; Dangers of Canned Foods; Vaginal Odor; Hating America; Having Children; Birth Control Pills; Male Ejaculation and Sperm; Oral Sex; Condoms v Pregnancy; Anal Sex; Capital Punishment; Terrorism. Racism; Largest Dog Breed; Search Engines; Soccer; Unprotected Sex Dangers; Muslim Bashing; Fraud Schemes; Three and Half Men TV Show; American Idol; Roofie (date rape drug); Face Sitting; Are X-ray Glasses Real; Illegal Immigration; Artificial Vaginas; Shoelaces; Longest Orgasm; Spider Silk; Timur the Lame; Instructions; Facts About Malaysia; French Kissing; Interesting Facts about US Presidents; Goddess of Mercy; Hummers; Sex Toys; New Wife and Sex After Marriage; What PC Brand to Buy; High Gasoline Prices; Aliens and UFOs; Dirty Harry Scenario; Anal Warts; Ram v Memory.

1 comment:

The Professor said...

Archived Daily Q-n-A from the Month of - May 2006:

//// Modified \\\\

Q) What’s the difference between RAM and memory? 31-May-06 Joann T.
A) Nothing. They are the same. RAM stands for random access memory.

Q) What are anal warts? 31-May-06 Joe R.
A) A form of venereal disease (VD) now referred to as STDs.

Q) I have heard of you. You are a real bastard you know that? 30-May-06 Fathyih Hiyam Farrin.
A) Yep and I make Dirty Harry look like a kindergarten crossing guard with a crooked smile. So what's your point?

Q) Do you personally believe in Aliens? 29-May-06 Parker Troon.
A) Hell yes, in fact I are one! This planet wouldn’t be so bad if it weren’t for you stinking filthy humanoids.

Q) Do you think the oil companies are gouging us? 29-May-06 Sara O.
A) YES. Remember the Arabs and the oil companies are one in the same.
Money and profits are all they care about. Iraq was and still is about oil, not anything else. They have it, we need it, simple as that.

Q) I have heard all kinds of things about computers. I just need the basics. What kind do you recommend? 28-May-06 Terry B.
A) Buy a Dell PC. Do not buy any type laptop unless you need portability for your job. Laptops do not hold up and are not what they are crack up to be. Avoid buying a Gateway, or Acer, PCs and Laptops; also Sony PCs are crap but their laptops are OK. Gateway being at the bottom of the list. Dell has a pretty good machine and comes complete with everything you need.
Make sure it has either Norton or McAfee anti virus all ready installed. Also do not install or use AOL. If you are looking for dial up MSN is as good as any. DSL is better, and Cable is the best.

Q) My wife of 10 months hardly ever gives me sex, what do you think I should do? 27-May-06 Shane M.
A) Assuming that she is not pregnant, divorce the bitch. I don’t care if she looks like she just walked out of Playboy’s Centerfold. If she doesn’t fuck what good is she?

Q) My boyfriend bought one of those artificial devices that simulates
blowjobs, what do you think of that?
27-May-06 Sophia G.
A) I’d say he may be gay, or is unsatisfied with your inability at oral sex, either one the relationship looks doubtful. Just move on or counter-punch with a large multi-speed vibrator (battery operated dildo) of your own.

Q) What do you think of Hummers? 26-May-06 Larry G.
A) I assume you are talking about the vehicle and not oral sex. The real Hummer (H1) is great, not practical for civilian use. The so-called H2 is a piece of shit and I wouldn’t drive one let alone own one. They have the name and body image but that’s all. As for hummers, the oral sex. I love them. In fact I just explode with passion every time I get one!

Q) Who or what is the Goddess of Mercy. 26-May-06 Barry N.
A) An ancient Chinese mythical creature, a princess.

Q) Have any U.S. Presidents ever received a Patent? 25-May-06 Paul Monroe.
A) YES. There has only been one so far in history, and that was Abe Lincoln who invented the ‘Floating Dry Dock’ and had it patented.

Q) My girlfriend loves to French Kiss and have me shove my finger up her vagina until she comes. She won’t give me sex until I perform first. Is this normal or what?
25-May-06 Sammy V.
A) Normal, that’s for you to determine. But anyone who insists on something specific all the time without consideration for your needs or desires has a problem. Get a new girlfriend, women are easy to get and come by.

Q) Are there some idiot factoids about Malaysia that was emitted from your website (blogs): malaysiasucks? 24-May-06 Stoney A.
A) Yes, here are some about BUMI Muslim Malays:
(1) Malays wash there new born babies in beer to ward off diseases.
Oh you bad bad Muslims you.
(2) Both drug abuse and alcoholism is on the rise in Malaysia with
Muslims. They have the highest rate of addiction in any Muslim country in the world. That must be caused by all the want and desire to be something other than Muslim Malays.
(3) I found rural village Bumi Malay and Indian factory girls to be very patient in work ethics. They are good at monotonous tasks like hand painting porcelain figurines. Unlike their Male Bumi Malay Muslim counterparts who are lazy useless low life do nothing ass wipes who only work when you watch them and their work ethic sucks.
(4) Yes, BUMI’s have sex before marriage (bad Muslims). I managed
several factory complexes in the Butterworth, Kulim, and Penang area
and would often catch young Bumi Malays having sex in isolated areas of the plant before work. Although I never caught them having intercourse, I have come upon them either getting dressed, undressed, or running away partially dressed. I did catch two gay Bumi Malay men kissing, and I have caught a Bumi young Malay girl on her knees fucking an older Bumi Malay’s cock. I also saw, what is referred to as a village elder (cleric type) fondling a young Bumi Malay girl. Bumi’s are allowed to work at the age of 16 so you draw your own conclusions.

Q) I read your answer about the artificial Vaginas. I have to ask, how does a man use a piece of fruit such as a melon? 23-May-06 Lydia Khones.
A) Apparently, you cut a hole in a very ripe melon (softer as it gets ripe) slightly larger than the penis diameter and about 4 inches deep. Then you put a small hole the size of a pencil on the opposite side all the way through to the first hole. Then the man inserts his penis in the larger hole with the opposite small hole open, and when with drawing his penis he covers the small hole up with his finger. Repeat process until orgasm
is achieved. Hey I don’t make this shit up. Apparently some college frat guys read about this somewhere on the Internet and tried it. Someone took pictures of them doing it and sent them to the Dean of Students. There goes the Kinsey Report studies.

Q) What was the Mongols name who erected pyramids from human heads?
22-May-06 Tyron Smyth.
A) You are referring to the Mongol conqueror Timur the Lame (1336-1405), who would play polo with the skulls of those he had killed in battle. Timur left a record of his victories by erecting 30-foot-high pyramids made of the
severed heads of his victims.

Q) Is it true Spider Silk is very strong? 22-May-06 Bee Bee Bonds.
A) Yes, spider silk is an extremely strong material and its on-weight basis has been proven to be stronger than steel. Experts suggest that a pencil thick strand of silk could stop a Boeing 747 in flight.

Q) What mammal has the longest orgasm? 21-May-06 Tara M.
A) Of the warm-blooded creatures on this planet, referred to as mammals, it is the Pig. A pig’s orgasm can last up to 30 minutes.

Q) What are those stupid plastic tips on the end of shoelaces called? 21-May-2006 Jason V.
A) Aglets

Q) What about artificial vaginas, do they work? 20-May-06 John Kerry.
A) Any relation? I have never used one. I prefer the real thing. So by
asking this you are strange is some way. But simply put man has been looking for something to replace the real thing since the dawn of time. Here are some things researchers have identified that have been tried by men of all ages:
-That costly hand-held device that is often currently advertised and doesn’t work.
- Blow up dolls (both plastic and rubber). They don’t work either.
- Melons, such as rock melon (honeydew), cantaloupe, and watermelon.
- Stuffed animals.
- Children’s dolls.
- Mannequins (Drill a hole in the vagina area).
- Soft fruit such as tomatoes or peaches, and yes a tomato is actually
a fruit, not a vegetable.
- Soft foods, such as mayonnaise, peanut butter, sour cream, cottage cheese, etc. while still in the jar or container. Please don’t put this back in the refrigerator after using.
- And, the most popular and most stupid often used, is the vacuum cleaner hose.

Q) If it were in your ability or power what would you do to fix the illegal immigration problem along our borders? 19-May-06 Joey C.
A) First what the world thinks and wants is no importance to America.
Securing our borders and keeping American citizens who vote and pay taxes to idiot politicians is the responsibility of every politician
elected regardless of their personal opinions. Saying that, I would build a 30-foot high reinforced concrete wall with broken glass embedded in the top of the concrete and razor wire on top of wall.
I would also add military strength barricades on both sides to stop
anyone from driving into it. Then on the Mexican side, but still on
our side of the border, I would add what is referred to as Tank Traps (a wide deep continuous ditch type hole). Added to this would be electronic sensors and a narrow vehicle road on our side to patrol.
As for the drug smugglers I would put the military into operation and execute them without mercy for what they are an invading enemy out to destroy America. After about a year people would just give up.

Q) X-ray specs are they real and do they work? 18-May-06 Gary T.
A) Yes and no. They are real and sold as a novelty. So the fact that they exist and people buy them make them real. As to whether they work,
no not as a pair of glasses that allow you to see through things, such as girls clothing. They are, as I said a gag gift. They are made of two pieces of cardboard with a small hole cut out, and a feather in the middle. When you look through them the image appears fuzzy or blurred, or off center (out of focus). The rest is just pure hype. As in you pretend to see
things. A great gag is to get your buddy to tell you something about his sister, such as a birthmark that is hidden under her clothes and you pretend to see it with the glasses. So go have some fun.

Q) I met this guy and I like him. He wants me to sit on his face.
What does that mean exactly? 17-May-06 Linda C.
A) It means what it says. There are two variations:
(1) The fetish variation, which literally means for you to plop your naked vagina on his face and sit there suffocating him.
(2) The most common sexual variation, which means to straddle
him with your naked vagina as he has oral sex with you. Often times done in the 69 position where you reciprocate by giving him a blowjob.

Q) What is a roofie?
17-May-06 Barb V.
A) A roofie (ruffie) is the street name for a Date Rape Drug.
Guys will often slip this into a drink at a party or bar, get you into a stupor, and then rape you. These drugs often have no color, smell, or taste and are easily added to flavored drinks without the victim's knowledge. There are at least three current popular date rape drugs used and easy to acquire:
- GHB (gamma hydroxybutyric acid)
- Rohypnol (flunitrazepam) ... most common used, and where the name roofie originated.
- Ketamine (ketamine hydrochloride).

Q) Who is your favorite to win the American Idol Contest this season?
16-May-06 Johnny S.
A) Taylor Hicks all the way. He knows how to sing and entertain an

Q) Do you watch Three and Half Men on TV? 16-May-06 Jenny T.
A) Absolutely every damn week.

Q) So if you were actually defrauded as you claim in Malaysia, and lost all that money, why didn’t you pursue your claim against the Malays in court? 15-May-06 Nor Ashani.
A) Simple, part of the scam was perpetrated by the previous Primer
Minister’s office staff and close personal political cronies. So do you think I am going to spend more money on a claim I had no chance of
winning? Are you that stupid or what you silly ass useless Bumi toad.

Q) Can’t you find anything better to do with your time than harass
Muslims and bash Islam? 15-May-06 Jane Alexander.
A) No you stinking filthy ass wipe of a liberal. I can’t, I won’t, and I like making fun of Muslims, because they make it so damn easy for the rest of the world to see them for what they are, Terrorist.

Q) My boyfriend and I have unprotected sex. He pulls it out before ejaculating. Is it true I can still get pregnant? 14-May-06 Tanya.
A) YES. By the time the guy realizes he is going to (cum) ejaculate he has already deposited some semen containing sperm. What you are doing is the same as playing Russian roulette with a loaded revolver. It isn’t whether you are going to blow your head off (in this case get pregnant) but when.

Q) Why do you think Americans hate soccer? 14-May-06 Jarold from the UK.
A) It’s a game children play in the USA. But when they grow up they play real sports like American bone crushing, ball busting, pain inflicting, serious ass kicking football.

Q) Who do you think is the BEST Search Engine on the Internet?
13-May-06 Alice H.
A) Depends on what you want. Search Engines currently have to be divided into four categories which are:
(1) If you are listing a NEW website including ranking, clearly it is now msn.com, probably followed by dogpile.com the worst is Google. Although Google makes it somewhat easy to list, it’s
ranking (positioning system on the Net) sucks. Google has too damn many rules for getting sites listed and ranked properly.
Google has been a failure to the general public for listing and
ranking websites ever since they went public and their latest
round of bullshit rules is like dealing with some useless outdated
government bureaucracy.
Yahoo is also terrible, even their email system sucks, and Yahoo’s
ability to list and rank sites is almost as bad as Google. Yahoo has
dropped from No. 1 to No. 3 by users and their stock has tumbled.
Google should learn from this and if you own stock in either Google
or Yahoo sell it now.
(2) For searches related to business only, Google is probably the best.
For pornography, Yahoo is probably the best. For general searches I
have found MSN.com and MYWAY.com superior to both Google and
Yahoo with DOGPILE.com a close second or third. The worst for finding things are aolsearch, netscape, ask, and hotbot.
(3)The most viruses, worms, trojans, adaware, and spyware I found Google to be the worst and they don’t even take the site down if you complain, doesn’t figure, now does it?
(4) For Free Email I have found MYWAY.com to be the best provider at this time and Yahoo the worst (spammers love Yahoo and Hotmail) with Google being in the true idiot column for wanting your cell phone number before issuing an email account.
Note: Never give any private information about yourself to anyone including your cell phone number, especially to someone like a search engine.

Q) What is the Largest Breed of Dog in the World? 12-May-06 Benny D.
A) A Mastiff. And the largest dog of record is an English Mastiff named Hercules that weighed 286 pounds in August 1999.

Q) What is the fastest horse breed? 12-May-06 Cindy I.
A) Strictly for speed, the Thoroughbred is considered the fastest, followed probably by the American Quarter Horse and The Arabian Stallion.

Q) What is your solution to Muslim Terrorism? 11-May-06 Joey.
A) Again a complex question, but four simple things could be done:
(1) Pick a target and set an example. As in level a town of 25,000 in Iran and level it so not even a tree is standing (total devastation and destruction).
(2) Coat all bullets with Pigs fat and blood, I do, and this adjust those useless Muslim attitudes.
(3) When our troops, for example in Iraq or Afghanistan encounter
anyone holding a weapon (even a sharp stick) they are shot on site.
(4) Tell the Muslim world if America is ever attacked again, one of their Holy Shrines will be destroyed, like Mecca. They would never think of attacking us again.

Q) Do you believe in capital or harsh punishment?
10-May-06 George K.
A) Absolutely. Pedophiles and I mean child molesters, not some high school kid who has sex with another student, should be castrated and kept locked up forever. For violent offenders such as terrorist, serial killers, murders for hire, and similar crimes if there are fingerprints, DNA, and one credible
witness they should be put to death the next day without appeal.

Q) I read your Q_n_A about anal sex. I have a similar question. My boyfriend likes anal sex and if he gets me in the mood and takes it slow and easy I have an orgasm. Is this normal? 10-May-06 KB.
A) Yes. Orgasms are caused by being sexually aroused. In women this is often as much mental as physical.

Q) I hear all this talk about condoms, but my friend still got pregnant, so what happened? 09-May-06 Jane C.
A) I wasn’t there, but most likely one of four things occurred:
1. The condom came off or was taken off and the sperm entered
the vagina.
2. The condom was defective, old, or was torn before using.
3. The condom was used more than once. Boys are stupid they have been known to use condoms more than once and even turn them inside out.
4. A lubricant was used and caused a chemical reaction with the condom material. Condoms are usually made from latex.

Q) Am I normal because I like sucking cock?
09-May-06 Barbra M.
A) Well whether you are normal I can’t say. But as for you liking
to suck cock places you in the normal zone. About 30% of woman
like to suck cock; about 10% won’t do it; about 40% do it to please
the man or stop him from bitching; and the remainder suck cock but don’t swallow, they just spit or allow the man to squirt it on them or finish by jerking the guy off. And, on the lighter side (humor) you have bad initials, i.e. BM.

Q) What are the differences in a male orgasm, ejaculation, and sperm? 08-May-06 Bubbles P.
A) Well Bubbles a male orgasm is the same as a female orgasm, you may know it better by the term “I am Cuming.’ Ejaculation is when the semen (cum) squirts out that little end of the penis head. Sperm is the thing you want to avoid, it contains those nasty little live creatures that swim up your vagina, pierce your egg, and make pregnant.

Q) Why do men want to have anal sex with me so much? 08-May-06 Beth.
A) Eliminating any possibility of a torrid reputation as in ‘Your Easy.’ There are three most likely reasons:
1. The anus (poop shoot hole) is tighter than the vagina (pussy) and
gives men more sexual pleasure.
2. Some men like to give pain and watch a woman squirm.
3. But most importantly, there is no chance you will get pregnant.

Q) I have been told you can get pregnant even if you are using the
‘Pill’, is this true? 07-May-06 Debbie S.
A) Absolutely true. It is generally caused by the body either rejecting
the birth control pill prescribed or by taking the same pill for a
prolong period of time which allows the body to essentially build up an immune system to that drug.

Q) I am thinking of getting married and having children, any advice?
07-May-06 Roxanne W.
A) Yes. Don’t get married just to have children you will end up in a
divorce. If children are your only objective try hiring a stud for
inception or going to a sperm bank and getting artificial insemination. If you have a potential mate and love enters the picture but children are still a top priority I suggest you both get tested ahead of time to see if you can produce off spring.

Q) I hate America, what do you think of that asshole?
06-May-06 Yussof bin Mohammad bin Azir.
A) First, No American with an ounce of intelligence gives a shit what you think. Second, well asshole, it takes one to know one.

Q) How did you get so damn smart? 06-May-06 Lucas W.
A) I went to school, studied hard, and I read a lot. Plus with age,
wisdom often comes, not always, but most of the time.

Q) Why does my vagina have an odor? 05-May-06 Laura.
A) Body Odor is generally caused by perspiration (sweat). Your sweat interacts with a body bacteria that we all have. This bacteria thrives anywhere there is hair. So if you sweat a lot and don’t wash well you get what is referred to as B.O.
Women who have excessive vaginal odor can eliminate this by shaving their pubic hair. Also wash your vagina frequently and change your panties daily. It is not a good idea to spray perfumes or other chemicals on your pussy.

Q) Is it true I shouldn’t eat canned tuna fish? 05-May-06 Gary L.
A) You shouldn’t eat any tuna fish more than once per week. Limit this to 6 ounces (one sandwich or a fresh piece baked in the oven). Tuna contains mercury and that will rot your brain and kill you.

Q) What causes hard stools in my bowels? 04-May-06 Randy L.
A) Generally it is either constipation or diet or both.

Q) My mother says I should only wear White Underwear, is this true? 04-May-06 Ms. Got2No.
A) Well there your mommy is right again. The reason is colored underwear contains dye. This dye can cause yeast infections, rashes, and other problems.

Q) What is (are) the world’s deadliest snake(s)?
03-May-06 Shaz B.
A) The world's 10 most deadliest snakes actually are all found in Australia.
They are …
(10) Western Brown Snake
(9) Death Adder
(8) Black Tiger Snake
(7) Tiger Snake
(6) Sea Kraits
(5) and (4) Mainland & Eastern Tiger Snake
(3) Taipan
(2) King Brown Snake
(1) Inland Taipan or Fierce Snake (most venomous snake).

Q) Why do I get Pussy Farts? 02-May-06 Anna.
A) Vaginal Gas (pussy farts) come from trapped air. Women generally get these during sex, but can have them at anytime. To eliminate this problem during sex, make sure your partner does not pull his penis out all the way out and then shove it back in.

Q) What is a corn husker? 02-May-06 Barry M.
A) A ‘cornhusker’ is a native or resident of the state of Nebraska;
it is also a worker who husks corn.

Q) Is it normal for a woman to masturbate? 01-May-06 Sally D.
A) YES, about 60% of all women masturbate on a regular basis compared to 90% of all men.

Q) What is the deadliest Spider in the world?? 01-May-06 Casandra K.
A) This is hard to say, the general accepted opinion is the Brazilian Wandering Spider, however, the most feared is the Australian Funnel Web Spider.