Oct 31, 2008

Q-n-A Postings for November, 2008:

Q-n-A Subjects for November 2008:
Training Little Boys to Pee; College Roommates; Children are Trying Sometimes; Women Wearing Fake Undergarments; Sobering Up to Reality; Girl's Choice, Male Rejection; Ham Sandwich; Tree Leaves Changing Color; Pro's and Con's Masturbation; Dog Sleds; Weird Things about Male Penis; Barack Obama's Choices; Waiting for a Man; Blackmail; The Uncle's Kiss; Cheating Boyfriend; Black Friday; Wine and Cooking.

Please submit your questions by email to:
thedailyqa@yahoo.com

18 comments:

The Professor said...

My 4-year boy just pees anywhere he damn pleases. I have taken him to a psychologists, tried timeouts, nothing is working. Do you have any suggestions?
November 01, 2008: Frustrated.
A) Yes. First stop spending money on those idiot psycho-babble so-called experts, throw all the books away, and try the old fashion method. It's called a spanking. Use a wooden spoon on his butt.

The Professor said...

Q) I am a student at ASU, a university known for parties. We don't get to pick our roommates. My roommate is something else, never studies, parties all the time, has her boyfriend over a lot. Anyway, my question is last Friday night her BF came over and asked her if I wanted to join them in a stack attack, and she said no without even asking me. I have a feeling that a 'stack attack' wasn't going for a burger, so what did they mean?
November 03, 2008: The Studious Roommate.
A) You are right, it didn't mean going for a burger, at least not a hamburger at fast food. It means when one guy has two girls at the same time. Specifically the two girls slide to the edge of a bed, one on top of the other both facing up and with their legs spread wide open and upward. The guy standing up, penetrates both of them by rotating his penis from one vagina to the other and sharing his ejaculation in both holes. Good for the man. You can draw your own conclusions what type of roommate you have if a girl would share her BF with another woman.

The Professor said...

Q) I have a 6-year-old son who drives me nuts. I can't afford counseling and the school recommended drugs. I have tried all sorts of things including spankings. Do you have any suggestions?
November 04, 2008: Another Frustrated Single Mother.
A) Drugs are a stupid idea. We have no clue as to the long term effects of giving drugs to children just because they are hyper active. It could just be a phase. You have some choices, wait it out (about another year) or try reverse psychology. When the child starts screaming walk away, make them follow you for attention, then walk away again, continue this, also say, “I can't hear you, scream louder.”
Another method is to sit them in a chair facing the corner and turn off all background noise such as the TV, radio, stereo, etc.
I would also recommend you putting him in some type of martial arts class (boxing, karate, aikido, etc.). Sometimes a boy needs a man and nothing else will substitute. Also try things like baseball, basketball, hockey – real men's sports.
Yu may want to enroll him in the Big Brother program.

The Professor said...

Q) Picked this girl up in a club last night. She looked good, Camel Toe, tight body, nice butt, great boobs. We went to my place, she went into the bathroom and when she came out she had a floppy belly, no Camel Toe, droopy tits, and a flat ass! Do you have any thoughts on this?
November 09, 2008: Feeling Bad.
A) Yes, you have been duped. We live in a society where woman can buy an assortment of add-on to enhance their bodies, like fake Camel Toes, butt enhancers, bra lifters and boob stuffers, and girdles to tucked in the fat. Welcome to the real world. I must assume she thought you'd be drunk enough not to care!

The Professor said...

Q) I woke up the other morning, looked down to see my panties were on backwards. So I know something happened but can't remember. Yes I was really smashed the night before, I am kinda worried, do you have any suggestions?
November 10, 2008: Sober Now.
A) If you're not on birth control you probably have a lot to worry about. Otherwise I suggest you get checked for STD's. If you don't have insurance, there are free clinics that don't ask any questions. Otherwise never get so drunk you don't remember what you did or who you sleep with.

The Professor said...

Q) I was watching some porn about deep throating blowjobs. I wanted my girlfriend to let me do it to her and she refused. What do you think, keep her or dump her?
November 11, 2008: Albert Finny.
A) My theory on women is simple. Anything you get while dating is cut in half soon as you marry them. If this is the only issue you have then keep her. But if there are other sex issues dump her ass. Men only stay in relationships for sex. Women have their own reasons and issues and they never agree with those of a man.

The Professor said...

Q) I was walking in Manhattan and two nice looking guys past me by, one said to the other, “She'd make a nice ham sandwich.” What did he mean?
November 12, 2008: The Receptionist.
A) That meaning refers to the girl being in the middle with two guys. Each guy puts his penis in a whole, one in the vagina, the other in your anus, thus a ham sandwich, they are the bread, you are the meat.

The Professor said...

Q) Why do tree leaves change color?
November 18, 2008: Jimmy Woods.
A) To answer this question, you first have to understand what leaves are and what they do.
Leaves are nature's food factories. Plants take water from the ground through their roots. They take a gas called carbon dioxide from the air. Plants use sunlight to turn water and carbon dioxide into glucose. Glucose is a kind of sugar. Plants use glucose as food for energy and as a building block for growing. The way plants turn water and carbon dioxide into sugar is called photosynthesis. That means "putting together with light." A chemical called chlorophyll helps make photosynthesis happen. Chlorophyll is what gives plants their green color.
As summer ends and autumn comes, the days get shorter and shorter. This is how the trees "know" to begin getting ready for winter.
During winter, there is not enough light or water for photosynthesis. The trees will rest, and live off the food they stored during the summer. They begin to shut down their food-making factories. The green chlorophyll disappears from the leaves. As the bright green fades away, we begin to see yellow and orange colors. Small amounts of these colors have been in the leaves all along. We just can't see them in the summer, because they are covered up by the green chlorophyll.
The bright reds and purples we see in leaves are made mostly in the fall. In some trees, like maples, glucose is trapped in the leaves after photosynthesis stops. Sunlight and the cool nights of autumn cause the leaves turn this glucose into a red color. The brown color of trees like oaks is made from wastes left in the leaves.
It is the combination of all these things that make the beautiful colors we enjoy in the fall.

The Professor said...

Q) What are the Pro's and Con's about male masturbation?
November 19, 2008: Gerald Ur.
A) The pro to masturbating is that you keep your willy (penis) finely tuned as they say. In other words, you keep it active and a hard-on is more easily achievable. It also reduces stress. If you learn to take your time, you can prolong the act before ejaculation thus increasing your stamina. It also reduces the amount of sperm in the semen and therefore reduces the chances of getting a girl pregnant, but I wouldn't take that risk. so use a condom during sex.
The con's to masturbating is fatigue. When you ejaculate it does make a male tired. Also you can rub it too hard with your hand causing irritation and discomfort. Too eliminate this, use a small amount of KY Jelly or baby oil.

The Professor said...

Q) How many dogs are on a dog sled?
November 20, 2008: Gina Romero.
A) A dog sled is a sled pulled by one or more sled dogs used to travel over ice and through snow. Numerous types of sleds are used, depending on their function.
Dog power has been utilized for hunting and travel for hundreds of years. As far back as the tenth century these dogs have contributed to the culture of people.
Putting together a dog sled team involves putting together a team of leader dogs, point dogs, swing dogs, and wheel dogs. The lead dog is very treasured, and seldom will mushers let these dogs out of their sights. Indeed, trained lead dogs become part of the family household. Important too is to have powerful wheel dogs to pull the sled out from the snow. Point dogs (optional) are located behind the leader dogs, swing dogs between the point and wheel dogs, and team dogs are all other dogs in between the wheel and swing dogs and are selected for their endurance, strength and speed as part of the team.
So to answer your question between one and ten depending on the type of sled, weight pulled, and distance traveled.

The Professor said...

Q) Can you tell me something weird about the human male penis?
November 22, 2008: Ronnie Smooth.
A) Sure here are 14 weird facts about the 'Penis.'
1. Smoking can shorten your penis by as much as a centimeter. Erections are all about good blood flow, and lighting up calcifies blood vessels, stifling erectile circulation. So even if you don’t care all that much about your lungs or dying young, spare the little guy.
2. Doctors can now grow skin for burn victims using the foreskins of circumcised infants. One foreskin can produce 23,000 square meters, which would be enough to tarp every Major League infield with human flesh.
3. An enlarged prostate gland can cause both erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation. If you have an unexplained case of either, your doctor’s looking forward to checking your prostate. Even if you’re not.
4. The average male orgasm lasts 6 seconds. Women get 23 seconds. Which means if women were really interested in equality, they’d make sure we have four orgasms for every one of theirs.
5. The oldest known species with a penis is a hard-shelled sea creature called Colymbosathon ecplecticos. That’s Greek for “amazing swimmer with large penis.” Which officially supplants Buck Naked as the best porn name, ever.
6. Circumcised foreskin can be reconstructed. Movable skin on the shaft of the penis is pulled toward the tip and set in place with tape. Later, doctors apply plastic rings, caps, and weights. Years can pass until complete coverage is attained. . . . Okay, I’ll shut up now.
7. Only one man in 400 is flexible enough to give himself oral pleasure. It’s estimated, however, that all 400 have given it their best shot at some point.
8. There are two types of penises. One kind expands and lengthens when becoming erect (a grower). The other appears big most of the time, but doesn’t get much bigger after achieving erection (a shower).
9. An international Men’s Health survey reports that 79 percent of men have growers, 21 percent have showers.
10. German researchers say the average intercourse lasts 2 minutes, 50 seconds, yet women perceive it as lasting 5 minutes, 30 seconds. Are we that good or that bad?
11. Turns out size does matter: The longer your penis, the better “semen displacement” you’ll achieve when having sex with a woman flush with competing sperm. That’s according to researchers at the State University of New York, who used artificial phalluses (ahem) to test the “scooping” mechanism of the penis’s coronal ridge. Next up: curing cancer.
12. The penis that’s been enjoyed by the most women could be that of King Fatefehi of Tonga, who supposedly deflowered 37,800 women between the years 1770 and 1784 that’s about seven virgins a day. Go ahead, say it: It’s good to be king.
13. Better-looking men may have stronger sperm. Spanish researchers showed women photos of guys who had good, average, and lousy sperm and told them to pick the handsomest men. The women chose the best sperm producers most often.
14. No brain is necessary for ejaculation. That order comes from the spinal cord. Finding a living vessel for said ejaculation, however, takes hours of careful thought and, often, considerable amounts of alcohol.
15. The most common cause of penile rupture: vigorous masturbation. Some risks are just worth taking.

The Professor said...

Q) What do you think of Barack Obama's new cabinet picks?
November 23, 2008: Andrea Thomas.
A) First of all he has not completed all his major cabinet post appointees.
Second, all I see is more of the same. He is picking a lot of blacks, liberals, and old farts who bring the same damn ideas to government. When he said change, that should have meant no one from the past, no previous politician or government official, a clean slate. People are going to be very disappointed, you can quote me on this. I expect a petition within 6-months for impeachment, like the one for GW Bush, it wont go anywhere but it will circulate.

The Professor said...

Q) How long should I have to wait before a man is ready to satisfy me again?
November 24, 2008: One Horny Girl.
A) The average guy between the ages of 16 and 30 will need about 30-minutes between erections, longer after that age, and probably not more than once per night if he is over the age of 50. The male enhancement pill will help that, i.e Viagra or Cialis.
Even men who can get erect after 30-minutes generally can't do it more than twice in a 4-hour period. Sorry women are better performers and can out last any man.
So the old adage goes my dear, 'You can't wear it out.' I gues you'll have to buy a vibrator.

The Professor said...

Q) One of my coworkers caught me kissing my secretary and she is demanding I pay her $1,000.00 or she will report me to HR. What do you think I should do?
November 25, 2008: Did a Bad Thing.
A) I wouldn't pay any bloodsucking blackmailer one red cent. Here is what you do, call the police, tell them you are being blackmailed, ask them for a sting operation. Then go to HR first, tell them about your coworker blackmailing you. If your secretary will back you that you two did nothing then you're Ok, if not come clean.

The Professor said...

Q) We are going over to my uncle's house for Thanksgiving Diner. I'd rather go to my friends house. Every time I go to my uncle's house he kisses me on the lips. I hate it. My mother says he is just affectionate. I think he likes young girls. What do you think?
November 26, 2008: Awkward Times.
A) Unless he is trying to put his tongue in your mouth, crab your butt or something like that or making real advances then I'd just let it go. You need to ask yourself if this is worth a family fight, possible a feud over?

The Professor said...

Q) I walked out into the dining area and saw my roommate kissing my boyfriend, what do you think I should do?
November 28, 2008: Feeling Rejected.
A) Get a new boyfriend and kick the roommate out.

The Professor said...

Q) So why is it called Black Friday?
November 29, 2008: Cookie McLane.
A) Black Friday always follows Thanksgiving Day, which is always on a Thursday in America. The reference to Black Friday is by retailers which indicate that day through December 24th is the period in which they operate in the 'Black.' As in they make money. Most retailers lose money throughout the year, so they are in the Red. However, this year will be one of the worse retail sales periods in the last 10-years.

The Professor said...

Q) I have started to get into cooking. I am single and eating out now is just too damn expensive. I have been watching a lot of these food shows on TV. I often here people like Emeril and Mario say use a good quality wine that you drink for cooking. Is this true?
November 30, 2008: Cooking Man.
A) No. I also cook. Wine is a flavor enhancement only and the alcohol is cooked off. I personally use whatever wine is on sale for cooking. I never pay more than ten dollars for a bottle of wine, red or white. These TV shows have sponsors so keep that in mind.